The Mummy

I dealt with my computer in the morning, trying to get it cleaned up, and I kept thinking that I should take advantage of the bargain ticket prices on Tuesday.  I took the buses over to the Grand Lake Theatre for the 4:30 3D showing of “The Mummy.”  It has received all sorts of negative reviews, but for only five dollars for a ticket, I didn’t really mind.  I would describe the movie as empty and too loud.  It reminded me of all sort of other movies, and I would rate it as worse than that Brad Pitt movie with zombies.  There was something very uncomfortable about the opening sequence with the airstrike in the attempt to steal ancient treasures.  It made me think of “Kelly’s Heroes” from years ago.  The love interest part of the plot was undeveloped and unconvincing and made you feel nothing.  The princess turned mummy looked like a dark turn on Darryl Hannah in “Splash.”  This movie is supposed to be an installment in something called the Dark Universe.  I can’t imagine audiences flocking to these movies.  Does anybody want to see remakes of The Invisible Man or Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde?  I don’t think anyone loved the last Tarzan movie, so I think certain ideas have to be left on the shelf.  This movie showed a lot of what I don’t like about CGI.  It looked like one of the first shots had impossible lighting, and scenes with spiders or rats looked and felt uninspired.  One problem was that we get hit with everything all at once, so that there is no growing horror.  The undead had no characteristics other than being obstacles for Tom Cruise.  It was more like we were in the middle of a video game.  The movie could have used some humor in the Steven Spielberg vein.  This movie was a fusion of Mission: Impossible with a horror movie.  One thing I can say is that the special effects of 2017 make the creatures look better than they were in the 1950s, when you saw mummies wrapped in bandages and moving slowly through cheap sets.  The reviewer for RogerEbert.com cited “Five Million Miles to Earth,” “An American Werewolf in London,” “Lifeforce,” “Star Trek 2,” “Evil Dead,” “Zombie,” “Tales from the Crypt,” and “The Bride of Frankenstein” as some of the movies that were plundered for ideas to make this epic.  Russell Crowe is Dr. Henry Jekyll.  I would say that this role was not one of his best efforts.  Cruise’s efforts to save the woman in distress at the end reminded me of yet another movie, “The Abyss.”  The two women in the story were hard to watch on the screen, and I think that most of us in the audience wanted to rid of both of them.  The Princess was strong enough to fight Cruise and take him apart, but it was hard to care what she did.  The barely noticeable romantic comedy elements involving Jenny were flat.  The first encounter between her and Cruise is given to us through dialogue.  Some of the scenes with human interaction are left out in favor of the set pieces.  We get an ending that has the Cruise character going on a worldwide search that brought to mind Caine in Kung Fu.  I have been reading that this movie is a big box office bomb.  I can’t imagine that it won over any female fans, especially when “Wonder Woman” is playing in many of the same theatres at the same time.  I would say that there is very little sense of fun in “The Mummy” that indicates a good two hours of entertainment.  We could all use a change from ugliness and darkness and a deafening soundtrack.  I felt a bit worn out as I left the theatre.  I still had time to take the bus to Big 5, where I wanted to buy a Warriors championship T-shirt.  I did find the one that I wanted for $25.  I overheard a 61-year-old woman tell the bus driver that she didn’t think women of her age should have long hair.  She said that she missed the basketball game because her television set went out. I saw many, many people wearing Warriors shirts and talking about the victory parade during the day.  It took a while for me to get back home.  These are the times when I like the late-setting sun in the days before the first day of summer.  Some of the people who died on June 14 include Mary Cassatt (1926), Alan Jay Lerner (1986), Peggy Ashcroft (1991), Henry Mancini (1994), and Richard Jaeckel (1997).  Today is a birthday for Boy George (56) and Donald Trump (71).  According to the Brandon Brooks Rewind radio segment for June 14, Paul McCartney recorded “Yesterday” in 1965.  In 1970, the Grateful Dead released the album “Workingman’s Dead.”  In 1972, fans tried to crash the gate at a Rolling Stones concert in Tuscon, Arizona, causing police to use tear gas.  In 1989, Zsa Zsa Gabor was arrested after slapping a Beverly Hills police officer.

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